Monday, August 12, 2013

The girl in the mountains.


A part of the reason for starting this blog was to be able to share the stories I was writing about my missions trip to Mexico. I wrote several of the stories like letters because it was an outlet for a lot of the emotions I was trying to process. I'll share a little more about the missions trip later but here's one of the letters I wrote to a little girl in the mountain village that we went to on our last day in Mexico. For those of you that already saw this on Facebook, there are more stories/letters coming and they will be posted here instead of FB. Thanks for reading!

To the girl in the mountains. I don't know your name but I promise you I won't ever forget your face. You have such beautiful brown eyes and you made me think of Pocahontas with your long, thick hair braided down your back. I met you on our last day in Mexico. We went to your village three hours away in the mountains to wash the people's feet and give everyone we could new socks and shoes. 

You and the children were very resistant to us being there and that was hard for me. I had just spent the last four days with children who were excited to see me and then to have your village scared of me and my team was difficult to deal with . I will admit that when I looked at all of you, and you looked away and didn't want to talk to me, I just wanted to climb back on the bus and hide until we could leave. I didn't want to stay where I wasn't wanted. But then I realized that y'all had probably never seen white people before, much less have a whole group of white people there taking off your socks and shoes and speaking a strange language that you couldn't understand. 

When you came and sat down in front of me, I smiled and said hello. You smiled back very shyly and looked away. I never wished I could speak Spanish more than I did in that moment because I wanted so badly to talk to you. I wanted to ask you questions about how you lived and find out more about you. I wanted to tell you how beautiful you were, to find out what you liked to do, ask how the shoes were fitting. The pink and white tennis shoes I put on you seemed to fit, but ten minutes later you came back and told me, through a translator, that they were too tight and hurt your feet when you walked. I tried so hard to find another pair of shoes for you, but everything we had left was too big.

I can't tell you how hard it was for me to have the translator tell you we had nothing left in your size. I watched your face fall and I was so disappointed that I couldn't find a pair of shoes for you. I wanted you to have new shoes so badly that I would have given you mine if I knew they had fit you. I prayed hard as you walked away that Buckner would have shoes for you next month when they brought the next shipment. I prayed that they would have a pair that would fit you perfectly and that they would be in your favorite color. 

I felt so helpless for the rest of the time we were in your village and I wish I could have done so much more for you. For all of you. My dad's shed would have been a better home for you than the shack you lived in. I wondered if you had enough food, if you had any other clothes than the ones you were wearing, if you had school, if you had any fun at all. I wanted to know how you lived up here in the mountains and what life was like for you but when I really think about it, I'm glad I don't know, because I would have probably felt even more useless trying to help.

When I came home, I looked in my closet at all my shoes piled up in the corner and it brought tears to my eyes. I was thinking of you and how you didn't even have one single pair of decent shoes, and I have several pairs that I never wear. I am humbled when I think of all that I have that I don't need and you're miles away in a village struggling to have your basic needs met. 

You taught me to be grateful for what I have, you showed me that there will be times when I can't help even if I really want to, you taught me the importance of James 2:14-16 and to have faith that God will provide when I can't do anything more.

I don't even know your name but I love you. I love you so much and I pray that you will get a pair of shoes that fit you the way they're supposed to. I pray that you will always have shoes that fit you. For the pretty, brown-eyed girl I met in the mountains, thank you for the handprint you left on my heart.

The missions team with the mountain village people. A lot of them traveled a long way to be able to see us.